a few thoughts on gay marriage

Prop 8 has been struck down in CA by a federal judge. Prop 8 was the CA constitutional amendment that defined marriage as between a man and a woman. The ruling is not the end of the debate (supports of Prop 8 have vowed to appeal to the Supreme Court), but this is a good time to think about the issues and have some clear-headed thought. To wit:

There was a time, not too long ago, when it was illegal for a black person and a white person to get married. Thankfully, in western society, we've moved past that.

There was a time, not too long ago, when a man could have multiple wives. Thankfully, in western society, we've moved past that.

There was a time, not too long ago, when marriages were arranged, and people did not marry for love. Thankfully, in western society, we've moved past that.

There was a time, not too long ago, when pre-teen girls could be married off by their fathers to settle debts, pay bribes, etc. Thankfully, in western society, we've moved past that.

There was a time, not too long ago, when my Northern Italian great-grandparents and my Southern Italian great-grandparents were grumpy that their son and daughter wanted to marry. Thankfully, in western society, we've moved past that.

The anti-gay marriage movement has been talking points lately. They've tried to say that straight parents make better parents, but that's been proven wrong. They've tried to say that being gay is a choice, not a genetic situation, but that's been proven wrong. They've tried to say that love between two men or two women is not as strong as the love between a straight couple, and that's been proven wrong. Now, ultimately, there's only one argument that they have left to use: that marriage has traditionally been defined as between a man and a woman, and we have no right to change that definition.

Except that we do.

First, the definition of marriage is up to society to make. Any Biblical definition of marriage must be taken with a grain of salt, particularly in light of all of the other weird and outdated rules that the Bible holds. We, as humans, get to define marriage, and when our needs change, we are able to change that definition.

Second, we have been constantly changing the definition of marriage for thousands of years. We've outlawed polygamy and legalized interracial marriage. Outside of the courtroom, we no longer look down on marriages outside of geographic areas or marriages for love, even among the rich and royal. We have a long tradition of changing the definition of marriage to suit our current beliefs, and the question of gay marriage is just the latest example of that.

So, I, for one, support the continued redefinition of marriage.